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a stupid though

Today has been joyous, even before the caffeine I was in a good mood. Perhaps this is because I woke up for the first time in a week without feeling as if I were dying. Yes, when I am sick, I'm a pathetic little whiny bitch. There have been times when I have looked around the room and thought to myself, "this is the last time I'm going to see this place, goodbye." Then I stay awake with insomnia for at least an hour, fall asleep, then I wake up again. I am still having difficulty bring though, so obviously I have lung cancer just like the girl from "The Fault in Our Stars." Either that or my asthma just acts up when my allergies do.

Anyway, when a person feels joyous it is really hard to gather up that "Ginger Rage" the blog is supposed to be named after. Truthfully, it's often quite difficult for me to feel rage. When I do feel it though, it's like a volcano, erupting and then twenty minutes later I'm over it. Sometimes have to apologize to the victims that were hit with my fiery lava.

Two paragraphs and still no point. Aren't you glad I feel joy today?

Now to the Pasted from a Google search below.

noun: joy
  1. 1.
    a feeling of great pleasure and happiness.
    "tears of joy"
    synonyms:delight, great pleasure, joyfulness, jubilationtriumphexultation,rejoicing,
    happiness, gladness, gleeexhilarationexuberanceelation,euphoria,
    • a thing that causes joy.
      plural noun: joys
      "the joys of Manhattan"

It seems to me in most cases joy is something that people expect to come from something. Joy as defined is a feeling of great pleasure and happiness with the following words right below stating a thing that causes joy. 

Things that cause me joy.
  1. Caffeine. Seriously, if I'm super caffeinated, I am joyous. I would literally hug a stranger on the street. I will text my crush and tell them that I am madly in love with them. I can't cry out of sadness, but I will fight the urge to cry out of pure happiness. Think the movie "Beaches" with less death.
  2. Whiskey. See response #1. 
  3. Great weather. I'm mostly cold all the time, just feel my hands.
  4. Success on something I've been working toward (followed immediately it no longer matter, what next)
  5. Text message from someone I care about.
  6. Spending time with someone I care about.
  7. Making someone life.
  8. Finding someone that actually makes me laugh.
  9. Great movies, great television, great writing in both of these things. 
  10. Inside jokes.
  11. Feeling important. 
  12. Nostalgia, because nothing was better than hurrying to finish dinner so I could watch Full House, or carrying my bright orange New Kids on the Block to Kindergarten or getting to play with my older cousins Barbies because I was finally old enough.

Things that make me feel the antonym of joy, also known as misery or trial according to the above definition. All of those things in reverse. This is when I play a sad song and sing along because believe it or not, it's also sometimes fun to feel sad. 

Today I've needed none of those things to bring my joy/happiness. It just happened, just like it sometimes does. A lot of people "normal" people might call this bipolar disorder. 

Either way, the real question, what makes you feel happiness/joy? 
  1. Person? If it's a person then great. Hopefully, they feel the same way or else you should find something else to be joyous about. This also means, don't be a dumb ass and push them away if they make you happy.
  2. If it's a person find something else that makes you happy. You need a hobby.
  3. Work? Great!!! That means do what you love and make tons of money. Either that or it means keep making things like art, over and over and over again. Then go do your money making job. I feel ya bro.
  4. Hobby? See number 3 if you're an artist, because that's all anyone is going to you doing while you aren't sitting at that desk or wearing that apron. 
  5. Everything else, I'm out of ideas. Why am I making lists for you? Go figure that shit out.

Everything I write is stupid. Everything I write is genius. 


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